Humor

A SATIRE advice column about alive, ahaha, and everything in between!

Unlike finals, we don’t get the week off for midterms, so this season is particularly mid. To all of you reading this article, keep pushing through! We are proud of you, and you are doing really well. The light is at the end of the tunnel, I promise.

In a shocking turn of events, the elusive “Hand Drill Hannibal” has struck again, this time pilfering hand drills from both Blacker Hovse and Page House within the last week.

A SATIRE advice column about alive, ahaha, and everything in between!

What happened to the days when a man could simply enter 15 or 45 seconds, saying nothing of more creative inputs, like 0:42 or 6:09?

Coming out of retirement once again, Miyazaki’s latest film The Boy and the Heron is wonderfully filled with themes of love, grief, and accepting change.

Well, you see, the stork union is a bit outdated, and the cabbage patch had to close down due to budget cuts. So, in today’s modern world, babies have found a new, unconventional origin – the Mongolian Grill. It turns out that after consuming a delightful feast at a Mongolian Grill, the body undergoes a magical transformation.

PASADENA, CA — In a based and green-pilled display of social responsibility, the California Institute of Technology reported its first year of carbon neutrality since 1898, according to a press release issued by the CalTech Sustainability Council on Monday.

Introduction: In the dystopian world of Panem, where each choice defines destinies and the division between good and evil is blurred more often than not, “The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes” dives into the core conflicts present in the entire Hunger Games franchise.

Q: “I’m stumped on what to get for my significant other who seems to have everything. Any unique gift ideas that show thoughtfulness?”